关系暴力是身体上的, 性, 心理, and verbal abuse within a dating relationship and includes stalking. It can occur in person or electronically and might be between a current or former partner.
《凯发集团官网》(沃克，1979)
Provides an illustration of the manner in which violence/abuse often becomes a pattern within a relationship. 而身体虐待可能只会发生一次, 通常有潜在的心理和言语虐待. 这导致了连续的循环. 这个循环通常有三个阶段:
第一阶段:紧张气氛的建立
During this stage there is an escalation of tension and feeling as though you are “walking on egg shells.” It is common for a decrease in communication with your partner and a struggle to compromise on issues. As issues continue to be put to the side and remain unresolved, the tension builds. As the tension builds it is common for the complainant to become more passive as the respondent becomes more oppressive. One may experience an increase in arguments and minor physical abuse such as pushing and shoving. This stage varies in length of time but becomes more frequent as the cycle is repeated.
第二阶段:暴力事件
After the tension has been building it finally erupts and there is physical violence. The respondent is unable to manage his/her anger and strikes out. This is usually the result of an outside event but is often portrayed as being caused by the complainant which is never the case. This may cause a feeling of “relief” because the tension is gone. 然而, you partner has now “learned” that the abusive behavior “helps” ease the strain on the relationship.
第三阶段:悔恨/蜜月
在这个阶段，被告非常抱歉和懊悔. 可能会有道歉, 礼物, and promises all in hope of gaining forgiveness that it will not happen again. Seeing this soft side and display of emotions may bring back fond memories and glimpses of the person that he/she fell in love with causing him/her to stay in the relationship hoping that it will get better. After a period of time the loving behavior begins to disappear and the cycle repeats itself.
随着时间的推移，周期发生了变化. The remorseful/honeymoon phase becomes shorter and the violence increases and/or intensifies.
Here are some things to look for when comparing healthy and unhealthy relationships:
健康的关系
| 不健康的关系
|
|---|---|
| 平等 -合作伙伴分享决策和责任. 他们讨论角色，以确保公平和平等. | 控制 – One partner makes all the decisions and tells the other what to do, or tells the other person what to wear or who to spend time with. |
| 诚实 – Partners share their dreams, fears and concerns with each other. They tell each other how they feel and share important information. | 不诚实 – One partner lies to or keeps information from the other, One partner steals from the other. |
| 人身安全 – Partners feel physically safe in the relationships and respect each other’s space. | 身体虐待 – one Partner uses force to get his/her way (for example, hitting, slapping, grabbing, shoving). |
| 尊重 – Partners treat each other like they want to be treated and accept each other’s opinions, 朋友和兴趣. 他们互相倾听. | 不尊重 – One partner makes fun of the opinions and interests of the other partner. He or she may destroy something that belongs to the other person. |
| 安慰 – Partners feel safe with each other and respect each other’s differences. They realize when they’re wrong and are not afraid to say, “I’m sorry.伴侣在彼此面前可以做“自己”. | 恐吓 – One partner tries to control every aspect of the other’s life. One partner may attempt to keep his or her partner from friends and family or threaten violence or a break-up. |
| 性尊重fulness – Partners never force 性 activity or insist on doing something the other isn’t comfortable with. | 性虐待 – One partner pressures or forces the other into 性 activity against his/her will or without his/her consent. |
| 独立 -任何一方都不依赖于对方的身份. 伴侣在关系之外维持友谊. 任何一方都有权结束这段关系. | 依赖 – One partner feels that he/she “can’t live without” the other. He/she may threaten to do something drastic if the relationship ends. |
| 幽默 -这段关系对双方来说都是愉快的. 伙伴们笑着玩得开心. | 敌意 – One partner may “walk on eggshells” to avoid upsetting the other. 戏弄是卑鄙的. |
From: Center for Disease 控制 and Prevention – Choose 尊重 Action Kit
If you feel that you or someone you know has been 性ly assaulted, Lewis University encourages you to seek help and report the incident.
请浏览凯发集团官网的 寻求帮助 请参阅更多信息和可用资源.
Lewis University encourages you to contact LUPD if you have experienced relationship violence while on campus.
访问凯发集团官网的 凯发集团官网的第九条 page to learn more about the Title IX investigation and your rights.
If you are or have been a complainant of relationship violence by a faculty or staff person, 请联系 Lori Misheck (815) 836-5272 or misheclo@lsqn.net 提交报告.
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